Discipline is not a superpower. Discipline is being who we say we are, and doing what we say we are going to do. It’s simple, and it’s hard, but discipline is not a superpower.

There’s been an awful lot written about the numerous advantages and disadvantages of remote work. We’ve read a bunch of it, and we suspect you have too. So rather than bore you with our grand unified theory on distributed work, we thought we might start offering some bite-size, useful ideas that you can take and actually apply to your business. To start, we want to talk about the importance of sharing a common “leadership language” and how that might be the best way for you to start truly aligning your team.

Let’s be honest, sometimes it just doesn't work out. 

In our coaching practice we talk to a number of leaders wringing their hands (rightly) about a decision to let a teammate go. Exiting a teammate is hard stuff. But when we’ve had the difficult conversation, tried aligning on a plan, tried the performance improvement plans (PIP), and performance still is not working out, then we must take action.

In the Rangers and the Green Berets, every class cycle conducts something called Peer Evaluations, “Peers,” for short. This process is an opportunity to lift the curtain that the cadre cannot see behind and offer insights into all the candidates' real behaviors—what they do when no one is watching. 

Tradeoffs help us achieve our goals within the real limitations of our organizations and industries. They are not inherently good or bad, they are just real. What intrigues me most, of late, is the tradeoff war that occurs between our ears; a war that has consequences and casualties—or rewards and benefits—depending upon our choices.  

Conflict occurs when two or more people, or teams, are in opposition to one another. Tension on the other hand, is when two or more people, or teams, are together in opposition to the circumstances. Conflict by definition, whether viewed in noun or verb form, must include a clash or an argument between competing bodies. Tension is a good thing because we all need to be stretched to reach our goals. No matter how uncomfortable the tension is, we all intuitively know that adversity is the gateway to growth.

I experienced an obstacle called “keeping the peace,” an obstacle we see often in marriages and partnerships. Keeping the peace looks a lot like quiet when you know you should speak up. But quiet is not to be confused with peace. 

Communication is a critical component of leading people. We build trust be demonstrating a pattern of dependable communication. As leaders these three communication commitments serve us well: clarity, courage, and consistency.

As leaders, we cannot please everybody, though we wish to. "Leadership isn't likership" means not everyone on the team will like the decision.

Letting people talk for distance means quieting our mouths and our minds. It’s letting our conversation partner own the air time and our undivided attention. It can be very hard because most of us are uncomfortable with silence and want to solve problems. So rather than truly listening, we are inclined to fill the space and get way ahead of ourselves, missing our chance for clarity.